Category Archives: Choices

“I just hate Christmas, don’t you?”

Leave a reply

I just hate Christmas, don't you?She was in the ladies room. The Cracker Barrel ladies room. Dolly Parton’s I’ll Be Home With Bells On was blaring from the speakers overhead. Washing her hands and trying to get the dust off her coat, without looking up, she said,

“I just hate Christmas, don’t you?”

My heart just sunk. This 70-something attractive woman was hurting badly. Reaching out as best I could, I stood in a busy bathroom and listened to her story:

“My husband died in 1998, I lost a son five years ago and then in November I lost my best friend, my miniature dachshund, Dottie Sue.” This little companion was the love of her life and constant friend and traveling buddy.

She talked on and on about how hard Christmas is when you are alone, how you wish it would just go away and didn’t I feel the same? “How am I going to get through it?”

We kept getting interrupted and moved around and out of the way but I continued listening, consoling, encouraging and reminding her of the wonderful memories she had of those she loved. I was so touched by her pain that I had tears in my eyes as well.

My phone was ringing from my purse, I was meeting up with someone to transfer a precious package, I answered it once and we continued talking and then it rang again. This time, although my call was less than ten seconds, she squeezed my arm, said, “Thank you” and took off. I tried to follow her but the crowd coming in prevented me from grabbing her and by the time I reached the dining room I didn’t see a sign of my hurting friend, nor in the parking lot.

What did it all mean? Why would the Lord send someone to me that I couldn’t help? And what else could I have said, before she bolted, that would have made a difference in her hurting heart?

I felt such failure, defeat and disappointment that day. I have pondered it ever since and I guess if anything, it has taught me a great lesson.

Christmas brings memories for everyone but they are not always happy ones. So what can we do in gatherings of friends and family? What do we say when someone is sad, lonely, missing a loved one or even a pet that is no longer by their side?

We just listen.

Someone who will sit and listen to those who are hurting is a rare thing. Most of the time people are too busy or they just don’t know what to say and avoid the uncomfortable. But the one with the broken heart may just want to share about their loss or their feelings, just as my friend in the ladies room wanted to talk about Dottie Sue. She knew I couldn’t fix it, she knew I couldn’t bring back her tiny friend and she knew I couldn’t make her pain go away.

But maybe, just maybe, in some small way, she was a little cheered up because she was able to share about the one she loved and missed so much this Christmas season. Her eyes would light up when she would tell me of her best friend’s puppy-like antics, even though Dottie Sue was 17 years old. She was even smiling a little while recalling the good times she had with the dog, her son and her husband. (Remember, the furry friend had only passed away three weeks ago.)

If you do nothing else at your holiday gatherings, seek out the one who is in the corner, watching the festivities. Or the one who is biting their lip to keep the tears from flowing. Perhaps it is the one who you know has suffered much this past year but is trying hard to not show it and “spoil” the day for everyone else. Go give them a hug, a squeeze on the hand, an “I love you”, and maybe even sit down beside them and ask, “How are you doing?”

There may be tears, but you have allowed them to share and you have shown you care. And the tears are healing balm to a hurting soul! If they don’t want to talk about it, respect that too and don’t push. Some people will not want to become emotional in public and some are just private. But many will appreciate you not ignoring their pain at this normally happy time.

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18.

You are the hands and feet of Jesus at Christmas, the most wonderful, and to some the most stressful, time of the year. He reminds us that He didn’t stay a baby but He gave His life on a tree for all of us, redeeming all who would take on His name. It is then our responsibility, our mission, to reach out, to love, to comfort, encourage. Remind them of the hope beyond this “veil of tears” and that one day Jesus will wipe ALL of those tears away and we will be reunited with those we miss so much.

So, what would Jesus do?

Jesus would listen. Jesus would love those that say they hate Christmas…and they really don’t hate it, they are just hurting. Don’t ignore their hurt and don’t ignore them just because you don’t feel you can say the right things. Just be there, just listen and just love like Jesus.


Of course we don’t just fast in JANUARY, but it is a great start to your New Year. GET your copy of The Daniel Fast Devotional. Available in paperback and Kindle.

The Daniel Fast Devotional

So, what did you expect?

4 Replies

Back in the day, my inlaws had a great place in the Ocala, Florida area. The entire family loved it there, right on a canal for boating and fishing, plus it was not too far from Disney World. There was great shopping and restaurants nearby, not to mention The Mighty Ocean.

But the best part?

It was FREE.

One summer, my mother, grandmother, younger brother and the only one of My Three Sons to grace the planet at the time, Kyle, decided to take advantage of the free vacation spot. The Sweetheart couldn’t get off work (or could he???) but graciously said we could go without him. Hmmm…little did I know that we would look back later and wonder who really had a vacation.

Heading  south, we made pretty good time considering our diverse party. It was a great week, the weather was fantastic and we just relaxed.

The decision was made to spend one full day at the ocean. So, this group of Indiana rednecks piled in the car and in no time we were claiming our spot on the beach. Kyle had a great time building sand castles and the rest of us enjoyed the sunshine.

Until the tide came in.

Being the newcomers we had no clue about tides and oceans or the rules of the beach. We had pulled our car up to our spot just like everyone else had done. This was the 80’s; obviously things have changed!

What we didn’t notice was that the other sun worshippers had MOVED their vehicles an hour or two earlier in anticipation of the changing tide. But the Hoosiers had not gotten the memo. Suddenly, a man came running over with excitement in his voice and yelling, “Why haven’t you moved that *&^%$#@! car?”

Blond and totally oblivious at the time, I didn’t realize that the wheels of our car were half-buried in the sand. Panic set in as we all jumped to our feet but that Buick was going nowhere, no way, and no how.

Our knight-in-shining-armor, who I assumed was there to save us, just kept shaking his head as if we were idiots. Okay, okay, we weren’t the smartest sand lovers on the beach. Finally, he hollered to a few guys around us for help and just like a scene from Beach Blanket Bingo, we were surrounded by muscle in no time. They heaved and pushed and rocked the car back and forth as it spun in the sand but she wasn’t budging!

Exasperated, our hero looked at me and said, “So, what did you expect?”

A valuable lesson was learned that day and even a beloved  Sunday School story came to mind that went along with our scenario. You can’t build anything on a sandy foundation. It sinks. Period. You will always need someone to come bail you out. Maybe it’s because the tide is coming in or because your sand castle is collapsing, but that house will just not withstand the storms of life.

Because you need a sure thing. You need a solid foundation.

In this world of uncertainty we must be established in what we believe! It is imperative that we KNOW Jesus Christ, not just know about Him. All of the Sunday School stories in the world will not do us any good if we have not been filled with His spirit. They are just stories until you know Him.

Look at what Jesus said here in the book of Matthew. I don’t normally use The Message version but this is so good, (don’t skip it! It really is good!)

“These words I speak to you are not incidental additions to your life, homeowner improvements to your standard of living. They are foundational words, words to build a life on. If you work these words into your life, you are like a smart carpenter who built his house on solid rock. Rain poured down, the river flooded, a tornado hit—but nothing moved that house. It was fixed to the rock.

But if you just use my words in Bible studies and don’t work them into your life, you are like a stupid carpenter who built his house on the sandy beach. When a storm rolled in and the waves came up, it collapsed like a house of cards.” Matthew 7:24-27

Stupid carpenter on the sandy beach. That was me that day because there was no plan, no thought that if you park next to the ocean you are going to have problems!

Today, at 99% of the beaches in the Sunshine State, you must park in the PARKING LOT; surely that rule/law came about the day after we left the ocean behind. I am a trendsetter like that! Mercifully, Frankie Avalon and his beach buddies saved the day and rocked the car right out of the sand…eventually.

Thankfully, I do not have to worry about that happening to me again. Nor do I worry about the spiritual house I am building. It is fixed on the Rock, Christ Jesus, and nothing can sink it or tear it down. These are homeowner improvements to my life! My house will not get washed away when troubles come.

so what did you expect

What do you expect when storms come your way? They will come, friend, they will come for sure. But we do not have to be afraid when we are built on the solid foundation, Jesus Christ.

What are you building on?

For the kingdom

When Ye Fast… In ALL Circumstances

1 Reply

Welcome! We are still praying and fasting through January; you can access all of our previous posts here. Tomorrow, we will discuss the Sword of the Spirit then back to more concentrated Daniel Fasts devotions. Now, on to the helmet!

I know very little about football, but can you imagine your favorite football team, all suited up and ready to hit the field, when the coach makes the announcement that they are to leave their helmets behind? Abandon the only protection they have for their heads, their brains? Football is an aggressive sport that requires serious protection and the helmet is likely the last piece of armor that a player puts on. But just because it is last doesn’t mean it isn’t important! Without a helmet, they risk serious injury that could affect them the rest of their lives.

Friend, I have given enough of an explanation above that anyone could finish this post! Ephesians 6 is the charge to the Church about the Armor of God. All it says about the helmet is “…and take the helmet of salvation…” no explanation why or what it means, etc. Paul just said to take it. Don’t forget it, don’t leave home without it! And we have seen all week long that you don’t pick up a piece of armor and then not wear it because it will do absolutely no good whatsoever.

The sentence with the instruction to take the helmet begins with “In all circumstances…” then proceeds to tell the reader to take the shield of faith, the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit.

In all circumstances.

We don’t get up every morning and think, “Hmmm…wonder if it is necessary to put on all of the armor? Can I just at least leave off the helmet? It’s so bulky and it’s hot under there. Can I go without just this once?” (Unfortunately in 2021 it is the dreaded mask that we struggle with but still wear every day!)

There is one who would love for you to leave it at home and that is Satan. The Bible calls him a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Those are pretty strong words! But they ring true because he is the enemy of your soul. He knows if you put on that helmet of salvation, you are confident that the Name you have applied to your life, Jesus, is more than enough to withstand his constant attacks!

” In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication.”

This helmet of salvation protects our minds. Satan works to bring doubt and confusion to the mind of the child of God. He knows if he can get you to question what you believe or even doubt the power of God, he will weaken you and then cause other things to come after you, etc. On and on it goes until you don’t even have the strength to pick up the helmet.

The Roman soldiers helmet also protected the eyes! With it, he could maintain his focus on the goal that was set before him. Likewise, we, as the Body of Christ, applying the Armor of God EVERY DAY, in all circumstances, can see what lies ahead, we can fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith!

When we are praying AND fasting, there isn’t a distraction, delay or detour that can trip us up. In all circumstances, He is our hope! Our goal is salvation, our goal is to see Jesus, the One who makes salvation possible. Jesus has given us the armor as protection against anything the enemy can throw at us. But if we don’t put it on, if we forget one piece, it is all useless.

Fast unto the Lord, build up your most holy faith by praying in the Holy Ghost and, in all circumstances, be faithful with the Armor He has provided. It will surely keep your physical body and your mind from things that would hinder or cause you to stumble. See you tomorrow and be blessed as you fast unto the Lord.

Need your own copy of The Daniel Fast, A Devotional? Get it on Amazon by clicking here!